Two Hours as a Poll Greeter

I have never volunteered to work for a political party in my life -- until last night.  Since the media kept insisting that the 2012 presidential election was razor close, and because Romney started advertising heavily in Pennsylvania, I decided to respond to an email request to canvass Democratic voters on election day.

So reluctantly I called the organizer and offered two hours of volunteer work.  She said she didn't need any more canvassers.  Rather she needed a poll greeter to hand out sample ballots.  "Okay, I can do this," I thought.

So I showed a little early to overlap with the previous greeter.  He was there with his wife and granddaughter.  He showed me how easy it was to simply ask the incoming voters, "do you want a sample ballot?"   And he instructed me to thank the voters as they exited.

I thought, "boy, even I can do this." And so I did.  Some people politely accepted; some said "no thanks," and some were hostile when they saw the Obama sticker that I wore on my jacket.

My jocular coworker started chatting up his female Republican counterpart.  She was a local Republican committee woman.  She mentioned her name and I was surprised that her last name was Martinez.  Surprised, because she did not look one bit Hispanic.  Later she mentioned that her husband was Cuban and that his parents actually fled Cuba.

Fairly soon I was on my own handing out the sample ballots and thanking the voters while they were leaving.   My counterpart seem to wait until I went first, then she would offer a Republican sample ballot.   Most people accepted both ballots out of politeness or perhaps a desire not to indicate their preference.  Some people gave one of us the evil eye when they realized who we supported.

This pleasant stalemate continued until another female Republican greeter showed up.  The first thing she said to her colleague was "do you know the Communist Party has endorsed Obama?"  She made a loud stink out of this hoping to draw others into the conversation but there weren't any takers.  She also had a hand bell that she would ring as people walked by advising them to "vote right, vote Republican."

Now my timid excursion into politics was raising my ire.  But I'm not a talker and besides what could I say to this wingnut?  I just kept handing out my sample ballots and for every one that was accepted, Lady Wingnut forcibly thrust her counterpart upon the hapless voter.

Now we both were able to identify people we knew as friends and neighbors.  Lady Wingnut spotted a woman with two children as they approached.  She said to her colleague, "that's one of my neighbors."  She greeted the woman and asked, "will you consider voting for Romney and the Republicans?"  The woman replied, "No, I want to keep my vagina."  Then she quickly ducked into the building.

Now even I was surprised by what I heard and so was Lady Wingnut.  She asked her colleague, "did she say what I thought she said?" Answer "yes."  "Well, I know why she said that -- she's a teacher!"

That was probably the highlight of the evening for me but I want to recount another incident.  A couple who looked vaguely familiar to me from church accepted my ballot.  The middle-aged woman showed me the ballot and asked whether it was necessary to fill in all of the ovals in order to cast her Democratic vote.  I explained that she could vote along party lines and just fill one oval.

A few minutes later the woman emerged.  She wanted to know why the names of the Republican candidates were listed before the names of the Democrats.  I looked at my sample ballot which listed the candidates in this order: Republican, Democrat, Green, Libertarian.  I told the woman "I have no idea why they are listed this way."  So I figuratively crossed the aisle to see the Republican sample ballot.  It listed only Republicans.  A neat lesson in open-mindedness.